i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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