dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Randomize