yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
