This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
