Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
