If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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