i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
