yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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