Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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