I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
