i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
