I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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