Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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