I can tuck mytits in my pants
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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