Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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