At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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