I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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