Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
should my penis look like a turkey
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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