Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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