I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
