sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
