Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
