I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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