Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Randomize
