It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
