Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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