Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
