Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
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