Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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