Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
