i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
