Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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