There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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