you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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