If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize