I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
