9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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