Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize