Me too!
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
