batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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