she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
