Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I just want nice things and good sex
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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