dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
