is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
