Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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