But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
This is my life. Enjoy the view
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
