I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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