does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
