i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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