Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
high people should be assigned attendants
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
